Darkness & Awareness

“If a man wishes to be sure of the road he treads on, he must close his eyes and walk in the dark” – “DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL” by St. John of the Cross, the most sublime of all spanish mystics.

In life, as in everything, we are walking through paths that we perceive as ladders that bring us toward a most important state of awareness. But we have tried so many times to get to this state after having opened a door and then realized by doing it other doors shut down (or get locked) at the same time. One door opens… Three doors close and so on and so on. It is our task to never loose patience, especially when the ultimate goal is to reach our own essence, our own being. We have done this, and we have wanted to understand better our inner self, and perhaps in some way or in all ways we touch the essence of the universe, grasp what it is, what it feels like, or what it makes us feel like.

Some people, through religion, try to find out a way of truth, but looking up, and not looking inside. Many doors close. And the path is mixed with more doubts and short not convincing answers. But why should we have to be convinced? Others, through daily work find a way to understand what reality is. The eternal relative reality, convex mirrors.

I am more mystical than religious and in this way I can consider “any path” valuable if this path is a way for me to meet other realms that I can’t meet through religion in itself. To me, religion was created by men. Mysticism comes from the soul. And now is when I speak about this power exchange between two people, the experience of fearing and confiding in someone at the same time; to feel pain and pleasure and it’s spiritual conclusions. To dare go further beyond, wanting to feel what it is like being an angel, and what it is like being evil. What it is like wanting to be a god, what it is like wanting to be a vassal; what it is like feeling free and slave. To feel free, happy, aware, big, deep, alive… In every one of our experiences.

I have gone through darkness, and it’s then when I have found my own light. If we walk in light, how can we perceive our own? And how can we realize what kind of light it is, how intense it is, how much balance is there between our light and our obscurity? When I walk in darkness a little light becomes a path, a bright tunnel, that I would not be able to see if I was walking in light all around me. My inner light is what I must see to understand the outermost light. And I have to say that the more I am aware and accomplished with what I find in my nature (exploring, finding, and accepting), is when the more doors open, one by one, each one leads to another. And they never, never close.

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